Smells Like Progress: Tinkering with the Nosferatu Deck

I may be a newcomer in VTES, but I've already heard the whispers: apparently, Nosferatu don't have the best tournament track record. That intrigued me. On paper, they seem perfectly capable: Obfuscate to vanish into the shadows, Potence to smash your face, and Animalism to summon half the local wildlife for backup. It's the full sewer-to-table package. So why aren't these sneaky sewer monsters dominating the tournament scene?

You won't find the answer here, dear reader. I'm far too inexperienced (and wise enough not to say anything bad about the Nosferatu) to pretend I know. But if Vampire: The Masquerade has taught me anything, it's this: make friends with at least one Nosferatu, or you'll eventually find yourself explaining a crime you didn't commit to your Prince… while your Nosferatu "buddy" is the only witness.

Since one of my friends loves the Nosferatu and always grabs their deck when we play, I decided to upgrade it. My Tremere have had their ritual tune-up, the Ventrue their noble refinements, it only felt fair to crawl into the dumpster and see if I could polish up the clan of dirt and secrets.

The Crypt

I wanted to prioritize Animalism and Obfuscate, so I picked multiple copies of Oskar, Lenny, Larissa, and the Dowager, then topped it off with Horace (wearing that lovely top hat that any Ventrue would covet, if it hadn't come from a landfill) and Baixinho. What a charmingly unsettling family portrait!

The Library

I cleared out the Potence-heavy cards. While punching things is fun, I wanted to lean into the Nosferatu's feral elegance. In came the Animalism classics: Carrion Crows and Aid from Bats. My main action card is Deep Song, because nothing says "healthy communication" like a song that starts a brawl anywhere on the table.

The plan is simple: bully my prey into regrettable fights or sneak past their defenses entirely. My defense plan is even simpler: hit my predator before they hit me. After all, if all of your minions are in torpor, you're not bleeding anyone, are you? To round things out, I added Guard Dogs and Underbridge Strays, because the Nosferatu love animals… in the same way the Malkavians love mental stability: theoretically.

Here's what the deck looks like at the moment:

Deck: From the Gutter, with love
Crypt (12, G6):
3x Larissa Moreira
3x Lenny Burkhead
2x Oskar Anasov
2x The Dowager
1x Horace Radcliffe
1x Baixinho

Library:
1x Slum Hunting Ground
4x Vessel
1x Rebel
1x Warsaw Station
1x Fame
1x Smiling Jack, The Anarch
1x The Labirynth
1x Haven Uncovered
1x Guardian Angel

2x Underbridge Stray
9x Deep Song
2x Army of Rats
1x Creeping Sabotage

2x Swallowed by the Night
1x Spying Mission
7x Lost in Crowds

6x On the Qui Vive
4x Protected District
4x Guard Dogs
4x Cat's Guidance

8x Carrion Crows
6x Aid from Bats
4x Taste of Vitae

I'm probably missing a few extra copies of key cards, but I'll test it anyway. As any good Nosferatu would say, perfection is overrated, function is what matters. Next week I'll put this deck through the wringer and share the results. If it goes well, fantastic. If it doesn't… well, the Nosferatu are used to hiding in shame.

The game never ends, only pauses. I'll see you at the next move.

Custodian Hargrave