Team Red, Team Purple, and a Midlife Malifaux Crisis

I started playing Malifaux about two years ago, which means I've been living in equal parts excitement, regret, and paint fumes ever since. The crew selection process was… painful. Picture me spending a solid month researching factions, scrolling through endless model photos like I was swiping on a dating app for miniature murderers. In the end, four factions made the shortlist:

Arcanists: Spellcasters. My natural habitat. Fireballs are basically my love language.
Guild: Guns, badges, and that gritty Western "shoot first, ask later" aesthetic.
Ten Thunders: One word: ninjas. Need I elaborate?
Neverborn: Actual nightmare fuel, and somehow I still found them charming.

Of course, "research" quickly became "shopping spree". I ended up with multiple core boxes: Misaki for the Ten Thunders, Rasputina for the Arcanists, and Dashel for the Guild. I painted Misaki's crew first and played my very first game with her. It was fun… but something didn't quite click. Apparently, ninjas sneaking wasn't my spiritual calling.

Then came Rasputina. Frosty, elegant, and definitely the queen of "please stay six inches away from me". Painting her crew was fun, but the rest of the Arcanists just didn't grab me. I realized Rasputina was the only one in the faction who interested me and I didn't want to build an entire ice empire around her.

As for the Neverborn… they terrified me. Not in-game, in real life. The assembly instructions looked like dark rituals, and the painting complexity made me question my sanity. So, I retreated. I may love monsters, but I wasn't ready to build them.

And that's how I landed on the Guild, my first true love. Dashel was a revelation, commanding, violent, and just the right mix of oppression and carnage. I was halfway through painting the Guard keyword when Lucius joined the roster. Dual faction! Guild and Neverborn! My inner lore nerd was delighted. My inner hobbyist was doomed.

I played countless games with Dashel's crew. Executioners executed. Mounted Guards galloped majestically toward certain death. Every gunfight turned into a glorious charge, followed by deeply satisfying murder. I was ready to expand my collection (Perdita? Lady J? I couldn't decide) then, bam, Fourth Edition was announced.

The hype was real. I was reading updates daily, refreshing the news like a caffeine-deprived acolyte of Wyrd. When I finally played my first 4E game (Dashel vs. Zoraida, the local swamp hag), I was hooked. The game felt tighter, meaner, faster. Everything I loved, just with more pain. Perfect!

Then came the Great Faction Divorce. Dual factions? Gone. Each master had to pick a side. Many players wailed, switched factions, or sold entire collections in protest. Me? I shrugged. Lucius left the Neverborn to fully embrace his Guild career, and honestly, I was proud. He finally settled down.

But then… something strange happened. As the weeks went by, I found myself reading fewer Guild reports and more and more Neverborn ones. Those creepy, elegant mechanics whispered to me. Before I knew it, I was deep in their lore and rationalizing new purchases with the enthusiasm of a man possessed. Within months, I'd acquired three Neverborn crews:

Returned: Kastore and his charming vampire entourage, bringing Hunger to the table.
Woe: Pandora and her unsettling children, spreading paranoia like a contagious mood.
Fae: Titania and her forest horrors, proving plants

So here I am, torn between Team Red and Team Purple, Guild tyranny and Neverborn chaos. Over the next few months, I'll be sharing my adventures (and misadventures) with these crews. Expect tactical insights, hobby failures, and the occasional existential crisis. After all, this is Malifaux, so no one comes out unscathed, but at least the miniatures look fabulous.

The game never ends, only pauses. I'll see you at the next move.

Custodian Hargrave 

Building my custom Tremere deck - part one

I remember holding my first Vampire: The Masquerade book in the early 2000s, nervously trying to make a character. My friend looked at me and said: "Read the Tremere chapter. You always play the wizard types". He was absolutely right. Within minutes I was hooked. Over the next two decades, I played mostly Tremere and Ventrue (with a short and regrettable "rebellious Nosferatu era", which thankfully passed before I started dumpster-diving in real life).

The Tremere fascinated me because they took their place in Kindred society. While everyone else inherited vampirism like bad family jewelry, the Tremere stole it with forbidden magic. Mortality? No thank you. They cracked reality until it gave up its secrets. A little hubris? Definitely. But you can't deny the ambition.

I also loved their discipline (in every sense of the word). Unlike most clans, constantly tripping over their own politics, Tremere built a pyramid of ranks: apprentices, regents, lords, it's basically Hogwarts, but with more blood theft and fewer owls. Sure, the pyramid collapsed eventually… but honestly, what Tremere ritual doesn't end in a little smoke and rubble?

In VTES, the Tremere feel just as versatile as in the RPG. Auspex lets them catch sneaky Nosferatu and Malkavians in the act, Dominate means extra bleed, and Blood Sorcery (aka. Thaumaturgy) adds that magical "oops, did I just set you on fire?" flair.Thank Caine masquerade breaches aren't a mechanic, because half my library would trigger SWAT raids.

When I set out to build my Tremere deck, I did what any Tremere would do: I cheated. Or rather, I found Orpheus' excellent Tremere deck upgrade guide and treated it as a "lost grimoire". (Thanks Orpheus, I promise to cite you in my next ritual, MUHAHAAAA.)

The crypt

Between the V5 and New Blood decks, I stuck to G6 and G7 vampires. Abraham, Chrysanthemum, and Trevor made the cut. Lloyd, Nassir, and Patrik? Out. Weaklings have no place in a cabal of the greatest mages. Ayse and Mason joined in, and it looked solid… but I still needed a star. Abraham could've done it, but I wanted more power. So I chose Ian Carfax, Justicar, with that sweet +1 intercept. Problem: I owned zero copies of Ian. Luckily, I found an online seller, grabbed three copies along with some other good cards, and even scored community intel in the process (Thanks Tibo). Tremere call it "mentorship". I call it: this community is awesome.

 

 

 

The library

I went classic: Conditioning, Mirror Walk, On the Qui Vive, Telepathic Misdirection, Deflections, Eyes of Argus. Sprinkled in some items, the Tremere combat module (Apportation, Theft of Vitae), and, of course, Govern. Lots of Govern. Because you want that wall as soon as possible right?

Deck: Please Let Me Intercept This Time V1
Crypt (12, G6-7):

3x Ian Carfax
1x Abraham DuSable
2x Ayelech
1x Ines Tristao
1x Trevon Parker
1x Chrysanthemum
1x Mason Ha
1x Ayse Dhanial
1x Lauren

Library (77):

1x Academic Hunting Ground
1x Arcane Library
1x Chantry
1x Pentex(TM) Subversion
1x Powerbase: Montreal
2x Vessel
2x Villein
1x Misdirection
1x Fragment of the Book of Nod
1x The Rumor Mill, Tabloid Newspaper

8x Govern the Unaligned
1x Judgment: Camarilla Segregation
4x Magic of the Smith

1x Bowl of Convergence
1x Sport Bike
1x Ivory Bow
1x Kevlar Vest
1x Sniper Rifle

4x Conditioning
6x Mirror Walk

4x Deflection
2x Eagle's Sight
1x Enhanced Senses
5x Eyes of Argus
2x My Enemy's Enemy
2x On the Qui Vive
5x Second Tradition: Domain
4x Telepathic Misdirection

4x Apportation
2x Rego Motum
6x Theft of Vitae

So this is just version one of the deck, more like a science fair project than a finished masterpiece. As a good Tremere, I fully expect a few experiments to blow up in my face before I get it right. Stealthy decks, beware: my Auspex might not catch everything yet, but when it does, my Blood Sorcery is ready to do… something dramatic. Exactly what? We'll find out together, that's the fun of testing. And if any Tremere elders are reading this, I humbly invite your wisdom, feel free to share your secrets for improvement with this eager apprentice!

The game never ends, only pauses. I'll see you at the next move.

Custodian Hargrave